


Dating Miss Sparklefingers

by ready3x



Category: Captain Marvel (Marvel Comics), Marvel 616, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Adventure & Romance, Angst and Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:08:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27327055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ready3x/pseuds/ready3x
Summary: After fighting yet another supervillain, Peter Parker feels blue and lonely. His friend Betty Brant encourages him to call his secret crush, the strong, beautiful Carol Danvers. After an awkward start, they find they have much more in common than they assumed...
Relationships: Carol Danvers & Peter Parker
Kudos: 9





	Dating Miss Sparklefingers

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Ultimate Spider-Man Annual #1 (2005)

_I hate my life._

Peter Parker, the superhero known as Spider-Man, was staring down a human wrecking ball in downtown New York. Alex Sychevich, the armored supervillain known as the Rhino, was charging at him with full speed, screaming: “I AM GONNA SMASH YOU!!”

The onlookers ran away in panic as Spider-Man dodged his the deadly horn mounted on his helmet. While Rhino's head crashed through a brick wall, he somersaulted in the air and retorted: “That's what they all say, egghead! Just give back that money, and you can get smashed at the next bar!”

“NEVER!!” Rhino screamed, clutching the money bag had just stolen out of the nearby Roxxon Bank. The heavily armored supervillain charged at Spider-Man like a one man stampede, ready to impale him with his razor sharp horn. At the last second, the webhead jumped two stories up, and Rhino only hit a parking car. Spider-Man clung to the wall and quipped: “How about you just hang on for a second?”

Spider-Man covered his legs in thick webbing, making Rhino fall flat on his face. But just a second later, he flexed his gigantic quads, and literally made the bonds explode.

“NOBODY CAN STOP THE RHINO!!” the supervillain spat out, and Spider-Man confessed: “Okay, that was impressive.”

The supervillain locked eyes with him and charged ahead, and suddenly, his Spidey Sense went off. Instead of attacking him, Rhino was running at the wall he was clinging on. Like a human battering ram, the Rhino smashed his superhuman skull into the solid concrete. It exploded like brittle egg shells, and the impact was so violent that Spider-Man was knocked off and cried in mid air: “OKAY, THAT WAS REALLY IMPRESSIVE!”

Flying headfirst through the air, the webhead desperately shot two web strands at a nearby street lamp. Just inches before impact, they went taut and catapulted him high up. But Rhino jumped up, used his massive arms to pluck him out of the air, and began to squeeze his throat.

“DIE, SPIDER-MAN!!” he screamed, while the webhead somehow tried to break free. Rhino's armored exoskeleton gave him incredible strength, and even Spider-Man's superpowers could not break his grip. The webhead desperately tried to pull his claws from his throat, and his head began to spin. Suddenly, he noticed that Rhino's horned helmet had two two big nozzles, which fed fresh air to his hermetically sealed head. With an ultimate effort, Spider-Man shot web goo into these openings.

“ULPPP!!” Rhino blurted out, suddenly choking and wheezing. Desperate for a breath of fresh air, he began to claw at his helmet, flailing around uncontrollably. When he ripped the gunk off the nozzles, the sticky webbing went all over his lenses, blinding him.

“AARRGGHHH!!” Rhino screamed. Without letting Spider-Man go, he blindly charged ahead, reducing the webhead to an unwilling passenger on the wildest rodeo ride ever.

“Stop! STOP!!” Spider-Man pleaded, desperately clinging to his back. The supervillain crashed through several cars, smashed a couple of street lamps and obliterated a fire hydrant, giving everyone a shower. Next, they ran past a construction site, and suddenly, Spider-Man had an idea.

“Okay, let's end this, you misguided missile!” he snapped, shot a web strand at Rhino's head and violently jerked his head to the left. The supervillain blindly changed direction, and before he could react, Spider-Man jumped high into the air, kicked open a giant cement mixer and buried Rhino under an avalanche of wet, sludgy cement.

“No! NOOO!!” the supervillain swore, but when he sank neck deep, he was unable to move a muscle. Spider-Man let out a big sigh of relief, but then, his Spidey Sense went off again. Suddenly, he felt a half dozen guns aimed at him.

“POLICE! This is Captain Jean DeWolff! Hands up, and lower your weapons!” a stern police woman shouted.

“Hey, hey! Firstly, I am the good guy here, and secondly, I am unarmed!” Spider-Man protested. Flanked by a half dozen colleagues, Captain DeWolff retorted: “Silent, vigilante! Unmask yourself, and show your ID!”

Spider-Man stared at the onlookers, but instead of finding sympathy, they were seething at the destroyed street. A shopkeeper shook his fist at him and shouted: “Why did you take so long, Spider-Man?! Why did you wreck this place? J. Jonah Jameson was right, you are a menace!”

“Ooo-kay! Time for me to leave!” Spider-Man retorted, swinging away with clenched jaws.

“HEY! Where is your ID?!” Captain DeWolff protested.

* * *

_I hate my life._

Carol Danvers, the superheroine known as Captain Marvel, was listlessly picking at her food in the mess hall of the SHIELD helicarrier. She had spent the morning testing a cutting edge SHIELD jumpjet. Normally, test flights were exhilarating, but today, Carol was in a funk. The Avengers were having lunch, and seemingly, everybody was sitting with their partner except her.

_Iron Man is having lunch with Pepper, Captain America with Sharon, Black Widow with Bucky, even Hulk has Betty. Face it, Danvers, as always, you are the odd woman out._

Carol knew how pathetic she sounded. Captain Marvel was Earth's Mightiest Hero, an invincible, flying powerhouse who wielded the power of a star, and was more a cosmic force than a mortal person. She had saved the world multiple times, and had braved dangers even gods would have shied away from. But even as a Kree hybrid, her soul was perfectly human, and like every homo sapiens, it craved a soul mate.

 _But who? I live a dangerous life,_ _and that_ _ruin_ _ed my relationships with Walter, Mike and Simon. Typhoid Carol's next date must be either a saint, a survivor, a lunatic, or all of the above. Face it, Danvers, it is an uphill battle._

With a big sigh, Captain Marvel listlessly finished her lunch, and made a decision. She grabbed her cell phone, rang her best friend and muttered: “Hi, this is Carol. This is the most pathetic phone call I will ever make...”

* * *

“Why are you showing me these crap pictures, Parker?!”

J. Jonah Jameson, the editor of the Daily Bugle, was irate. As usual, Peter had made photos of his battle versus Rhino with his belt cam… and as usual, his penny pinching boss was not satisfied.

“Look at this mess! This picture is out of focus, the next one only shows Rhino's rump, and the third one shows Spider-Man in a _heroic_ pose,” he spat out, as if this was the worst insult ever. He puffed his cigar, crumpled up the polaroids and snapped: “Parker, I want Spider-Man beaten up, or humiliated, or both!”

Suddenly, a slender woman with a brunette bob calmly stood up and replied: “Mr. Jameson, I think that Mr. Parker's pictures are pretty good. Just look at this photo, it shows how Rhino smashes into Captain DeWolff's police car, while Spider-Man jumps away.”

J. Jonah Jameson glared at Betty Brant, his secretary. He chomped his cigar and snapped: “So?”

Betty exchanged the tiniest wink with Peter and elaborated: “Mr. Jameson, it shows that Rhino is a public menace who fights the police, and that Spider-Man is too cowardly to help.”

The tabloid mogul clenched his jaw, stared first at the photo, then at pokerface Betty and finally at nervous Peter, before he suddenly grinned: “Perfect, Ms. Brant! I want Captain DeWolff's account, and I maybe it is possible that Spider-Man helped Rhino?”

“I would not rule it out, but I am skeptical,” Betty stiffly replied, but crossing his fingers behind his back, Peter eagerly nodded: “Maybe, Mr. Jameson?”

“That's the first sensible thing you said, Parker!” the tabloid mogul exclaimed, blowing happy cigar clouds. “Ms. Brant, run the Rhino story on the front page tomorrow. I want the headline: 'POLICE STOMPS RHINO – SPIDER-MAN: COWARD OR COMPLICIT?”

“Very well, Mr. Jameson,” Betty muttered, and he grinned: “Use that picture of Parker's, it makes Spider-Man look weak! Perfect!”

“So, that means you will take my picture?” Peter grinned.

“Of course!”

“So will I receive Page 1 payment?”

“Of course not! It is totally blurry and grainy!”

Peter cringed, but Betty cleared her throat. J. Jonah Jameson glared at her, but finally relented and snapped: “Okay, Parker! You will get Page 1 pay, but only because I am having a good day!”

“Thank you so much, Mr. Jameson!” Peter beamed, and Betty quickly led him out before his skinflint boss changed his mind. While they walked down the hall, Peter wiped his brow and groaned: “Thanks, Betty, JJJ was about to rip me off again.”

“You are welcome, Peter,” she smiled, made sure that they were alone, and continued in a low voice: “Being Spider-Man is a tough job, and I am happy to help you!”

“You are the best, Betty!” he beamed, and gave her a big hug. Betty was his confidant and his good friend, and it was so nice to have someone who was close professionally and personally.

“I know,” she grinned, before Peter asked: “Can I invite you to a coffee?”

“Sure!” Betty smiled. They went into the Daily Bugle cafeteria, got two frappucinos, and sat down at a table. After a bit of relaxing small talk, Peter asked: “So, how are things going between Flash Thompson and you?”

“Pretty good! Flash is a bona fide meathead, but his heart is in the right spot. Being in the army really made him mature, and he cringes when I remind him of his 'Puny Parker' taunts.”

“Oh, that is a lifetime ago, we were both stupid kids back then. How is Ned taking the news?”

“My divorced ex? He doesn't like it, but I don't care. Peter, it is quite flattering to have a muscle bound lover, who is ten years your junior, and effs your brains out every night!”

Peter blushed, then chuckled: “I can believe that!”

“Peter, It makes wrinkly, saggy breasted me feel young again,” Betty beamed, while Peter eyed his attractive friend in disbelief, “but enough of me. How is your dating game going on?”

Peter's shoulders sank, and he muttered: “Pretty bad, Betty.”

“Oh, that sucks. I conclude that your date with MJ didn't go as planned?” she asked as gently as she could, and he muttered: “It was a disaster, Betty. Last Tuesday, I finally managed to ask MJ out to Vinny's Pizzeria on 8 pm. As you know, that was the evening when Dr. Octopus went on a rampage. When I finally defeated him, it was half past 10, and I would rather have fought a dozen Doc Ocks than face MJ's wrath.”

“Ouch.”

“Ever since MJ discovered my secret identity, she accuses me that I am together with Spider-Man, not her. Lessons learned: dating your ex is bad luck, especially if she has a point.”

“Well, at least you tried. But yes, you need a girlfriend,” Betty sighed, and he agreed: “I am sick of being alone. But which woman would take me?”

“With your lifestyle, I think you should date another superhero. A civilian doesn't work, just ask Carlie.”

“I agree, but that eliminates like 99.9% of all women.”

“Just stay with me for a sec, Peter. Aren't there any attractive female superheroes you can date? How about one of those spider themed females, like Arana, Silk or Ghost Spider?”

“That would be like dating your little sister!”

“How about Jessica Jones? She is tough as nails, and sometimes even works here.”

“Isn't she with Luke Cage again?”

“I don't think so…?”

“Well, firstly I am rooting for them to patch things up, and secondly, Jessica's… bohemian lifestyle is not my cup of tea.”

“Fair point. How about our good friend She-Hulk?”

“Good pick! Jennifer is smart, STRONG, and super sensible, but I don't know how to put it...”

“Her bulging biceps don't make you hot,” Betty mercilessly concluded, and Peter nodded ruefully. Suddenly, she bowed forward and grinned: “You should finally show your true colors, Peter. There is one superheroine who is your age, a model citizen, and that always made you hot!”

“What are you talking about?”

With an evil grin, Betty reached into her purse and produced a copy of WOMAN magazine, the spinoff of the Daily Bugle. On the front page, there was a glossy, very flattering shot of a blond bombshell. Her tight black outfit consisted of a domino mask, opera gloves, a leotard with a lightning bolt symbol, a flowing red sash, and thigh high boots. The title was: CAROL DANVERS, EARTH'S MIGHTIEST HERO!

In addition, it was an expensive variant edition, and was signed with “To my big fan Peter <3, C.D.”. When Peter recognized his favorite pinup magazine, he turned chalk white, then beet red. Recognizing all the kiss marks he left on Carol's lips, neck and, uh, curves, he blurted out: “Where did you get that?!”

“I know you, Peter! I know where your mancave stash is,” Betty replied dryly, and let him squirm. She grinned inwardly how hungrily Peter stared at Carol Danvers, clad back then in her old, black, disgustingly sexy Ms. Marvel uniform. The value of the copy had skyrocketed since then, because Carol had become bigshot superhero Captain Marvel, and shots with her previous Ms. Marvel persona were regarded as vintage material. That being said, you could have paid Peter a trillion dollars, and he would have never parted with his copy.

Finally, Betty smiled: “As you know, Peter, Carol is not only a superhero, but also our good colleague. Remember when she started working at the Daily Bugle? While I quickly grew friendly with her, you hardly dared to look.”

“Carol is the hottest woman I have ever seen! It fills me with shame, but during her Ms. Marvel times, I hardly dared to team up with her because I was so intimidated.”

“Well, now it is a few years later. Carol turned into Captain Marvel, and is single. Why don't you call her?”

“I don't think that would be a great idea.”

“Are you scared?” Betty goaded, but he muttered: “I bet she doesn't even know me anymore.”

“Is that so bad? You avoid getting friend zoned.”

“Are you serious, Betty? She would just hang up on me!”

Betty calmly took a sip of her frappucino, and grinned: “Peter, do you know why I am having this conversation? Because I had the EXACT same talk with Carol a few days ago.”

Peter stared at her and blurted out: “Are you telling me that you are Captain Marvel's BFF?!”

“You never asked,” Betty chuckled, then smiled: “Both Carol and you are Daily Bugle staff, and as a secretary, I know how to keep contact... especially with good friends!”

“I will never underestimate you again,” Peter muttered, and Betty grinned: “Good idea! But first, give yourself a go and call Carol. I know you find her hot, and I am pretty sure that she will be receptive,” Betty smiled and encouragingly held up the magazine. But when Peter tried to take it, she pulled it out of his reach and grinned: “No more fantasizing! Next time, Peter, you will kiss the real Carol Danvers!”

When they went back to their office, Peter would have rather fought a hundred Doc Ocks than to grab his phone.

* * *

In the evening, Peter returned to his Queens apartment, slumped in front of his couch and switched on the 7 PM news. The reporter said: “… today, the vigilante known as Spider-Man fought the supervillain known as Rhino. Here is an eyewitness account!”

The camera showed the shopkeeper again, who complained: “Spider-Man is such a nuisance! Who told him to wreck our neighborhood? No one! He should pack his belongings and go to New Jersey. By the way, he looks fat!”

“FAT?!” Peter echoed in disbelief. He angrily grabbed the remote and smashed it against the TV screen. With his typical Parker luck, the screen cracked, the remote broke into two, and the channel flipped to a horrible 24/7 telemarketing show.

“I like mindless entertainment, but not that mindless,” Peter spat out and pulled the plug. He stared into a dead screen, then summoned all his courage, picked up his phone and dialed. Peter was so nervous that he nearly fainted, and was almost relieved when the phone rang four times, five times, six times, and nothing happened. When he was about to hang up, suddenly, a tired female voice answered: “Hello?”

Peter was so shocked that his finger twitched, and he accidentally ended the call. Loudly cursing himself, he feverishly redialed the number and prayed that he didn't blow his chance.

“Hello?” the female voice finally replied again. Peter was so nervous that no sound came out of his mouth, but with an utmost effort, he pulled himself together and blurted out: “Hi, this is Peter Parker!”

“Peter who? Where did you get this number?!”

“SHIELD contact list,” he nervously replied, and suddenly, the female voice gasped: “Oh, it is you, Peter PARKER!! I am so sorry, Peter, I didn't recognize you!”

“H-Hi, C-Carol, no problem!” he replied, immensely relieved to hear she wasn't angry. She continued: “Nice to hear from you, Peter! How I can I help you?”

Peter's heart almost pounded a hole through his chest. His throat constricted, and he mustered all his courage and blurted out: “Carol, I wanted to know if you want to hang out with me.”

Silence.

“Hang out? Hang out with me?” Carol muttered, and he repeated: “Yeah, just hang out with you!”

“Is this a Spider-Man thing? Do you need Captain Marvel's help against Green Goblin, Dr. Octopus or Venom?”

“Thanks for the offer, Carol, but it is only you and me!”

Silence again. Peter froze up, fearing he had made a horrible mistake. Without any doubt, Carol was cringing at the other end, feverishly trying to find a way how to tell him to get lost--

“That sounds like fun!” Carol suddenly exclaimed, and Peter immediately thawed and proposed: “How does tomorrow noon in front of Marco's Ice Cream Parlour sound?”

“Sounds great, Peter! I have a busy schedule, but I can arrange two spare hours. Sadly, I must end the call, there is Avengers sparring tonight in the Helicarrier. If I don't make it Marco's, you know Iron Man kicked my ass.”

“Kick him in the ass instead, you have my permission,” Peter chuckled, and Carol laughed. Finally, she concluded: “I gotta go now, Peter, but thanks for calling. That was super cute.”

“No problem, Carol, and good bye!”

“Good bye, Peter!”

When the call ended, Carol used her mobile phone to get an up to date picture of Peter Parker. She saw a ruggedly handsome stud with a jolly grin and smart bright eyes, who was exactly in her age range - neither too old to be out of touch, neither too young to lack life experience. Her lips curled into a smile.

* * *

Next day, a nervous Peter Parker stood in front of Marco's Ice Cream Parlour. It was a busy parlor in a busy street, and even with his super senses, it was impossible to scan the area for Carol. When the clock struck noon, he nervously adjusted his blue blazer with the red tie and began to panic.

_Where is Carol? What if she got beaten up by Iron Man? What if she ditches me at the last second? What if--_

“Hi, Peter!” a familiar voice greeted. Peter turned around and saw a tall, blond woman in a flight jacket, a red top and form fitting blue jeans. It was Earth's Mightiest Superhero.

“Hi, Carol! You actually came!” Peter beamed, and Carol beamed: “Of course I did, Peter. It's so nice to see you again!”

They warmly embraced, and Peter's cheek burned where her lips softly pecked him. With a dazed smile, he proposed: “S-So, can I invite you to a famous M-Marco's Ice Waffle?”

“Isn't that a total calorie nightmare?” Carol muttered, but he grinned: “Trust me, it is worth it!”

While they queued, Peter glanced at her in awe. He took in Carol's strong, curvy body, steeled by years in the military. Her cropped blonde hair made her look tomboyish and sexy, and he tried not to drool at the exciting curves underneath her tight tank top. Peter smiled: “You look great, Carol!”

“Likewise, Peter. I just spent the morning in a SHIELD flight simulator, that's why I am I am still wearing this jacket.”

“That's dedication!”

“You can't keep a pilot away from a jet plane, even make believe ones,” she guiltily smiled, while they finally ordered their ice waffles. Peter watched as Carol warily took a lick. Her eyes grew wide, and with a stunned smile, she gasped: “Oh my! This is fantastic!”

 _She has dimples. That is so cute,_ Peter adored, while he eagerly nodded. While the two strolled into the nearby park, Carol hungrily continued licking and giggled: “When the Kree conquer this planet, we will assimilate this ice cream parlour first!”

When Peter furred his eyebrows, she giggled: “Just kidding! I can't even beat my Avengers team mates!”

“Argh, did Iron Man get a few punches in?”

“Oh, Iron Man was no problem. I got my ass handed over by Black Widow, don't ask for details,” Carol muttered, but Peter wearily sighed: “Join the club. In all my time sparring against Natasha, I never landed a single punch.”

“Oh, I forget you were an Avenger, too!”

“Not for long, it kind of fizzled out. I guess I am a natural loner,” Peter whispered, while Carol suddenly froze. For one second, he feared he had said something wrong, but her eyes were locked on a man, who sat on a park bench. He was reading the Daily Bugle, and there were two headlines. The big one said “AVENGERS BLOT OUT ABSORBING MAN” with big shot of Captain Marvel, and the smaller one accused “COWARDLY SPIDER-MAN DUCKS FIGHT!”

“Oh, you guys fought Crusher Creel yesterday. Sorry I could not join in, but I was helping my Aunt May to bake cakes,” Peter muttered, but instead of being angry at him, Carol hissed: “There is nothing to apologize for! J. Jonah Jameson is such a slimy hypocrite. On one hand, he hates vigilantes like Spider-Man, and on the other hand, he kisses the Avengers' ass. Quitting the Daily Bugle was the best thing I did.”

“Yeah, I don't blame you. It's a pity we didn't work much together during our time there. It was nice to have a fellow superhero around.”

“Oh yes, we had some nice team ups! I remember Spider-Man and Ms. Marvel beating up criminals. Betty told me how you tried very hard not to stare at my ass,” Carol purred. Peter jumped up in his chair and lied: “I did not!”

She calmly stared him down, and he buried his face in his hands and guiltily confessed: “Yes, I did, and I am so sorry!”

Peter half expected her to uppercut him to New Jersey, but instead, Carol evilly patted her backside and grinned: “Firstly, I value your honesty, and secondly, it is a great ass!”

Peter let out a sigh of relief, and decided to skewer Betty over red hot coals the next time they met. Suddenly, Carol confessed: “Don't feel bad, Peter, I am guilty, too. When you wear your Spider-Man costume, it's hard for a girl to ignore that large bulge in your crotch.”

“Oh!” Peter blushed, instinctively crossed his legs, and stammered: “I—I never thought about it.”

“You don't want to know what Wanda, Jennifer and me discuss,” Carol chuckled. Mortified that Scarlet Witch, Wasp and Captain Marvel had debated on his manhood, Peter stuffed his fingers into his ears and cringed: “I don't want to know!”

“You have many female fans, Peter! We value a guy who is smart, courageous, funny, and has muscles in all the right places,” Carol giggled, looking him up and down approvingly.

“Oh, I know,” Peter grinned in a playful macho tone, and both laughed. Next, Carol continued in a more serious tone: “Peter, you are such a good guy! Still, the public hates you, but adores the Avengers. Tony, Steve, Natasha, Clint or me, are treated like rock stars! Why don't you go public, make stupid J. Jonah Jameson look silly, and join the Avengers, too?”

“Carol, I totally see your point. But firstly, I like being an Average Joe, and secondly, outing myself would put too many people I love in danger, like my Aunt May.”

“Oh, the one who baked your cakes with?” she smiled. Peter produced his mobile phone, and showed her a picture of Aunt May. It showed a small, gray haired, strong woman with clever eyes and a steel spine. He commented: “She raised me as her own, and always supported me, before and after I revealed my superhero identity to her. I would never do anything to harm her.”

“I totally understand, and Aunt May seems like a very strong woman! I would love to meet her,” Carol beamed. Peter nodded encouragingly, but then sighed: “She is pretty much the only woman who can put up with me. My last girlfriend, MJ, broke up with me because she could not cope with my superhero life. Now she is a successful model, and I watch her stroll on red carpets while I eat frozen pizza.”

“MJ, as in Mary Jane Watson? She is a stunner!” Carol gasped, and Peter wearily agreed: “She really is, and she deserves someone better than me.”

Suddenly, Carol's severe features softened. As Captain Marvel, she was Earth's Mightiest Superhero, and Peter found it odd – and touching – to see her so vulnerable. She took Peter's hand and replied: “No, it isn't your fault, it simply didn't work. You made a clean cut, and I think it was the best for you both. Trust me, I speak from experience.”

Carol's fingers burnt in Peter's hand, but neither made an attempt to let go. Instead, he asked: “You do?”

“Peter, my love life has been a mess, too. First I fell for the late Walter Lawson, the first Captain Marvel, until he rejected his humanity and went into outer space. When I became a superhero myself, I hooked up with my therapist, Mike Barnett. He never accepted my superhero life, and it ended when Mystique... came along,” she hissed through clenched jaws.

“Yeah, I can also relate,” Peter whispered full of pained sympathy, and Carol gasped: “What?!”

“I had a girlfriend, Gwen Stacy, until Green Goblin... came along. It always stays with you.”

“It does,” Carol muttered, and suddenly, Peter put his arm around her shoulder. She whispered: “Finally, I was together with Wonder Man, until Simon, the living ion, stopped having human interests. There were days I just wanted to hear him call me 'Miss Sparklefingers' one more time.”

“Miss Sparklefingers?!”

“Yes, that was the pet name he gave me, but in the end, he didn't care anymore. Long story short, all my guys either only loved superhero Carol or human Carol, but not both.”

There was a long silence, and it made them grow closer. They were having a moment, and both were happy to share it. Suddenly, Peter whispered: “Carol, what if you had a boyfriend who appreciates both sides of you, because he is both a superhero, and an Average Joe?”

Carol just stared at him. Peter grew chalk white, pressed his hands in front of his mouth and blurted out: “I am so sorry! I can't believe I said that!”

Before Carol could react, Peter had jumped onto the next tree and vanished between the high, thick branches. She looked after him and gasped: “Peter...?”

High up, Peter feverishly tried to climb so high that he could escape this planet. Finally, he came to his senses, and muttered: “Parker, you fought Thanos. How hard can this be?”

With a very red face, he climbed down, reappeared in front of Carol, and apologized: “Sorry, I acted like a jackass.”

Instead of being angry, Carol took his hands, locked eyes with him and smiled: “Don't be sorry, Peter, I think that was cute!”

 _She is flashing those dimples again,_ he thought, and he knew he was grinning like an idiot. But instead, Carol moved so close that he could smell her perfume, and he stammered: “Cute is good?”

“Cute is good.”

Carol closed her eyes, opened her lips and moved in to kiss him. But just before contact, Peter's Spidey Sense tingled, and one moment later, there was a loud explosion. Smoke billowed from the nearby main street. Carol and Peter instantly changed into their superhero costumes, and bellowed: “Let's go!”

* * *

“See ya, suckers!”

Cackling maniacally, Herman Schultz, the supervillain known as the Shocker, ran out of the Stark Finances bank. He lifted his hands and blasted another wall with his powerful vibro gauntlets. Over his shoulder hung a bag full of stolen cash, and he jumped away with his powerful kinetic boots.

“Stop!” a policeman screamed, and shot at his knee. The bullet glanced off his red and gold vibro armor, and in return, he blasted him several feet through the air. Shocker gloated: “Pathetic! I am big leagues, boy! Do you know who I am?”

“A loser!” a voice high over him jeered. Before Shocker could react, a red and blue blur whizzed past him and karate kicked him into the jaw.

“OWW!!” Shocker screamed and blindly fired at his attacker, but hit nothing but air. Next, his face was blasted with sticky goo, but he just saw enough to see a six foot, sleek but incredibly ripped superhero in red-and-blue, webbed spandex.

“SPIDER-MAN!!” Shocker screamed. “Finally, we meet again!!”

“Finally you will go to jail again,” Spider-Man taunted, while he somersaulted through the air and dodged his gauntlet blasts. Shocker went after him, and a blast shattered a DAILY BUGLE advertising sign with J. Jonah Jameson's face.

“Wow, good shot! Can you do that again?” the webhead cackled, and Shocker spat out: “Stop joking around! My gauntlets will smash you to f%§/§& smithereens!!”

“Oh, language!” a female voice behind the supervillain snapped. Suddenly, a strong hand grabbed his shoulder and mercilessly turned him around. Shocker stared at a tall blonde Amazon with red, gold and blue spandex, who glared at him with steel blue eyes and sparkling fists.

“F§(“ OFF!!” Shocker screamed, blasting Captain Marvel from point blank range. Each shot would have ripped a bull to shreds, but they simply glanced off her bulletproof body. Earth's Mightiest Superhero chuckled: “That felt good! Can you do my back now? I had a rough morning.”

Shocker stared at her in panic, and before he could take another blast, Captain Marvel simply ripped off his gauntlets, let her fists glow with starburst energy and melted them to slag.

“Oh, f§/”!” Shocker blurted out, while Earth's Mightiest Superhero grinned: “That word again? Are you unfulfilled?”

With a chalk white face, the supervillain abruptly turned around and tried to run away. But before Shocker could escape, Spider-Man mummified him with thick web strands, violently yanked him up a street lamp and made him hang head down from ten feet.

“Ladies and gentlemen! A big hand of applause for the AMAZING SPIDER-MAN!!” Captain Marvel bellowed, holding up Spider-Man's hand. The crowd raucously approved, loudly clapping and chanting: “SPIDEY! SPIDEY! SPIDEY!!”

“Wow, that is something unexpected,” Spider-Man gasped, and Captain Marvel smiled: “You deserve it!”

With a warm smile, she gestured him to climb on her back, and under the applause of the crowd, they flew away. Spider-Man hardly believed his luck when Captain Marvel allowed him to wrap his limbs around her strong, curvy body. In return, she purred with delight when he felt his strong, warm hands around her shoulders. Finally, Captain Marvel landed on top of the Stark Enterprises Tower. When Spider-Man climbed off her back, he quoted one of his favorite flicks: _“Maverick, you can be my wingman anytime!”_

 _“Bullshit, Iceman! You can be mine!”_ Captain Marvel retorted in style, and he chuckled: “I thought I was the Top Gun nerd!”

“You cannot outgeek a pilot on airplane flicks,” she grinned. Suddenly, her Avengers smartwatch buzzed, and she groaned: “Oh no, Peter, my two hours are up. I have to go!”

“Fair enough, Carol. I just want to tell that I really enjoyed our date,” Spider-Man confessed, and she smiled: “Me, too! Can we meet again? How is your schedule this week?”

“It sucks. I balance freelance photography for the Daily Bugle, part time teaching at Empire State University, and my superhero gig,” he muttered, and she sighed: “Mine is just as bad. I am a test pilot for the Air Force, and a full time Avenger. But can we meet Saturday evening?”

“Oh, that would be great, but I don't want to push.”

“You aren't! I really want to see you again, Peter... and I think you want to see me, too,” Captain Marvel smiled. _She is flashing her dimples again,_ Spider-Man stared in awe, and he eagerly nodded: “Of course I do, Carol. I really want to make this work, unless I have to save the world.”

“In that case, I won't be available either,” she chuckled, and noted: “Okay, Saturday evening it is. I will send you my private contacts, and we can stay in touch!”

“That sounds great, Carol!”

“But before I go, I think you deserve a reward. For your eyes only, Peter,” Captain Marvel smiled. She lifted her arms, proudly thrust out her chest and disappeared in a bright starburst. When she reappeared, Spider-Man's jaw dropped. Instead of her red, gold and blue spandex, Carol now wore her old black uniform with the domino mask, the opera gloves, the swimsuit with the lightning bolt, the red sash and the thigh high boots.

“Oh my!” Spider-Man gasped, while Captain Marvel turned around, posed like a supermodel and let him drool at her toned muscles, her voluptuous curves, and the perfect peach of her ass. Before Spider-Man could react, she lovingly pulled down his mask, pinned him against the wall and kissed him. His eyes grew wide as he took in her sweet, hot tongue, and then, he wrapped his arms around her waist and squeezed her.

“Mmm!!” Captain Marvel purred approvingly, and whispered into his ear: “Betty told me you liked this uniform.”

“I am ashamed, but it's so disgustingly sexy,” he confessed, greedily looking her up and down. Instead of being insulted, Captain Marvel was visibly flattered by his drool. In return, she hungrily felt up his bulging biceps, his chiseled chest, and the rock hard six pack. But finally, Spider-Man whispered: “Can you change back into your new uniform, Carol? I like you in black, but I like the new you even more.”

“Oh, you charmer!” she smiled, disappeared in another starburst, and stood in her bright red, gold, and blue again. They greedily continued making out again, and she looked down and giggled: “Do you know how much your crotch is bulging out?”

“I know, and I don't care, dear Miss Sparklefingers!”

“Oh, you are so cute,” Captain Marvel purred, deliciously blushing when she heard her pet name. After a small eternity, they reluctantly parted. She blew him a kiss, and soared into the air like the shooting star she was. Spider-Man stared after her in awe, until he finally made his way back.

“Wow, wow, wow!” Spider-Man gasped all the way, while he swung back to his home. He felt as if he could hug the entire world, dizzily somersaulted through the window and nailed the landing in his own living room. Peter undid his mask, pulled out his mobile phone and saw: “YOU HAVE 1 NEW CONTACT REQUEST!”

With a big smile, he scrolled down and found that a certain “CPT_SPARKLEFINGERS” had typed “Hi Maverick! :D”. He logged into his chat app, and accepted the request. High up in the SHIELD helicarrier, Captain Marvel smiled at her mobile phone when “WEBHEAD616” accepted her request and replied: “Always your wingman, Ice <3”.

Both eagerly started to chat.

**Author's Note:**

> Nerd note: in the late 1970s, Carol Danvers indeed was a Daily Bugle employee, and was Peter Parker's colleague. In one issue, she famously demanded equal pay from J. Jonah Jameson, which was unusual back then.


End file.
